Blue Cavern

This is Vanity Smurf reporting from the Great Smoky Mountains.

Our first stop was at the Pancake house, where some may eat pancakes (they don't compare to smurfberry cakes) and I am busy admiring how good I look with the Gatlinburg backdrop



Then I went to the Aquarium, to admire myself in front of the stingray petting zoo or what ever that is...all I know is I looked really good



After an encounter of some sorts with a shark, I decided to pay the rednecks a visit...just follow this sign



but not wanting to end up with a red neck, I went on top of the Smoky Mountains instead, disregarding the warnings about snakes, Bobcats, turkeys, bears, elks...and whatever else is roaming in the woods.



Jumping of the railing, I immediately made good friends with Bambi. This really should come as no surprise to anybody...I mean what is there not to like about myself?


Mrs. Raccoon liked me also a lot...but she was no Vanity smurfette so I left.


Which was a mistake....
because it was then that the horror started

Suddenly, my beautiful..oh so beautiful reflection was darkened




and I did what I always do when this tragedy happens...I fainted



and woke up to a roaring headache



A bobcat thought he was Azrael and wanted to take a bite out of me



The bear successfully told the cat who the master of the Smokies is.
After a masterful fight during which I made sure it didn't negatively affect my beautiful reflection, the bear told me that I reminded him of somebody..only I was much more beautiful (well, that is a given of course..nobody is as handsome as I am) and took me to the impostor who looked like me. Our way led to an Indian Village and this sign welcoming sign really should have told me who my impostor was.



Now, this part is the most unbelieving part of my trip

That rogue Syd Smurf (calling himself Chief Syd) somehow landed in the Smokies after getting lost in Pennsylvania I wanted to provide proof of this outrage to Papa Smurf, but that vain Syd smurf (who isn't even half as handsome as I am) started to charge me for taking our picture, so I told him "screw you" (sorry, but this is the only language he understands)..and secretly took a picture of his wigwam when he was busy chasing the squaws. Why he thought he'd be more successful with them than he is with rollerskaters is beyond me..


Apparently I am not only irresistable to myself, bears, Bambis, Mrs Raccoons, but also to Squaws, so Syd threatened me with life without my mirror (and he would do it, too that bastard ) unless I won enough money in his casino to make my getaway before he returned from his hunt. This left me plenty of time to play every machine in there and to have some fun as well


And I won my getaway car....a fourwheeler for two (me and my mirror) that is every man's dream



and rode back on the Highways of Tennessee towards my new destination



But not without stopping at Shoneys of course (we are in the South after all)


After proving to Syd Smurf what a real smurf looks like, all I can say

Tennessee sounds good to me

Wow Vanity! Sounds like you had a really good time! Good job you weren't driving though or you would have had to take your eyes off the mirror for a moment! And fancy you finding Syd out there!



(Great story Moey! )

Excellent story and pics, Moey...that cracked me up

That was fantastic, Moey!! I love Vanity Smurf at the best of times but you made him even better!! (of course, he would argue that he is always at his best! )

Very entertaining Cheers

love it Maureen

How on earth did Syd find his way there I wonder The mind boggles.