[Bunno Smurf]

I've been away for the weekend to Perth for a family wedding. My nephew, Hayden (19), was getting married. It was one of those usual "family" gatherings. You know the kind of thing: groom's parents are separated but they both have to attend the wedding though they can't stand the sight of each other. Groom's father brings his new partner who has recently given birth etc etc. Groom's grandparent's prodigal son, who they haven't seen for the last 12 years, decides to come to the family wedding though he has no idea who the groom is and how he is related. Also decides it'd be a good idea to pull his bongo drums out during the photos and start playing. Days of Our Lives stuff.

Anyway it made me wonder if anyone had any interesting stories from weddings they have been to. (PS: Don't make them too scary.....we're still trying to trick..... I mean convince Graham to get hitched.)

[SuperJen]

Hmmm yes I have one of my own.

Here's the short version.....

Abby and I have been together for 6 years, engaged for 3. As soon as we got engaged my mum said if my step mum (of 20 years) came to the wedding, she wouldn't come. A few months ago (and 3 years later), dad talked her into coming even though Chris was going to be there. So on with the wedding plans ..... until ...... dad pipes up and says to Abby that we're a Christian family (I was never Christened, and am not religious, nor is any of my family), and that I should get married in a church. The final straw was when dad then said to me and I quote ......

"'I've always wondered why Abby's family are so accepting of you because you're not Turkish or Muslim. I have a fear that they think, 'Jenny's a lovely girl, and her family owns a factory, and holiday houses, and they all have nice cars and money, yeah we can accept her."

............ After many tears and going into a state of shock, Abby and I have now decided to get married on a beach somewhere far far away......

Weddings can be wonderful so long as the couple involved remeber that they will never make everyone happy so why try. Just make eachother happy.

[Bunno Smurf]

Sounds like a good plan, Jen. My sister-in-law (the groom's mum) is planning to remarry. She said "Geez its too hard to make everyone happy we're gonna elope". Good on them! If I had to do it again I would too!

My mother-in-law had a huge row with me 2 weeks before the wedding and I was so upset I cried for about 5hrs straight. In all my wedding pics I have bloodshot eyes as I burst the blood vessels in both eyes and they didn't heal up in time. Which probably explains why we now live a good 2hrs drive away from them!

[aussiesmurf]

Well I just got engaged on New Years day!!

As with all families I am expecting the 'I'm doing this', 'why r they doing that' etc...I think the most frustrating part that I have is that I am marrying a guy who is Macedonian..and apparently the grooms mother organizes the whole event, this coming as a big big surprise to me, to find out that she picks the day, place, etc. Although this is nice in its own way it is also quite frustrating in that every girl dreams of her own wedding and how it will be, what can I do? Grin and bear it....

Anyway I am in the process of convincing Jim that we should really get married in a whole other country cause my family r just going to whinge and whine...and I don't want that on my big day....

Fingers crossed that I will marry in a whole other country, hopefully close to germany so I can just nick across and get some new smurfs....

[Guest]

Its never gonna happen Linda !

[SuperJen]

Congratulations Megan!!!!

I've got a few Macedonian friends and I've never heard of the grooms mum organising the whole thing! Are you sure? That seems a bit strange.

All those kinds of weddings, Maco, Turks, Lebs, Greeks, Ital are so over the top I love those kinds of weddings. Abbys Turkish and we were both looking forward to a big Turkish wedding with about 300 people sooooooo much. I think we'll just have a huge party when we get back with bellydancers and the works.

Will you be doing the money pinning? Turks do that too but Maco's pin the most!

Oooooo I'm getting all excited now, I love weddings like that!
Congratulations

[aussiesmurf]

Thanks

well u know his mum could just be telling me this to get here own way...she has already booked the place for the reception and told me after the fact...

Jims brothers wedding was 700 people and his cousins was 550 so I have told them that I would like small wedding (not big on crowds) but it may have fallen on deaf ears..

They no longer pin the money on the dress they do it mafia style in the envelope..but the band gets money shoved in there pockets while they play...at his cousins wedding i think the band alone got like $7,000+ I told jims dad I wanted to be in the band....

I would love to see a turkish wedding, I attended an Indian wedding last year in Malaysia it was really different.. I enjoyed seeing how another culture celebrates...

[SuperJen]

She booked it just like that? And is it a reception centre that you like? I hope so.

A few years ago some of our Maco friends got married and they had about 500 people and got $60,000!!!!!! When Abby's (my fiancee) sister got married she had 600 people and got $25,000. I say invite the world!!!! More people more money!

Turkish weddings are alot like Macedonian weddings, except they pin the money on sashes that the bride and groom where around their necks. If i was having a Turkish wedding I think I'd attach an eftpos machine to my sash .... 'check, savings or credit?'.........

[Syd Smurf]

Congratulations Meagan

I am planning to elope too as the family situation is just too hard to deal with. I have been dating Mrs Dyar for around 13 years and our parents have only meet twice....I am not kidding either. My Dad has never met Mrs D's parents at all. I guess there's not much chance of a friendship growing there.

I have always wanted to get married in Canada although no guesses what's become the biggest attraction about Canada since joing the forum (poor Attom ).

Of course I'm not getting married until Graham does...so no pressure from me Graham...take your time.

[DrunkSmurf]

I am planning to elope too as the family situation is just too hard to deal with.

Uh, er, uh... elope? As in sneak out the back window and catch a ferry to Tasmania?

I didn't invite anybody to my wedding so I wouldn't feel so guilty about blowing off all my friends' weddings.

But, hey, Superjen, if you're planning to have a big Turkish wedding...

We were thinking about having a Chinese wedding, but considering Chinese weddings nowadays consist of a bunch of middle class Shanghai hipsters trying to have American weddings, we decided to pass.

Traditionally, white is the color of death in China, while red is the marriage color. The only thing red at a modern Chinese wedding is the imported Australian wine!

[aussiesmurf]

Yep just like that the reception place is booked...its not what I would have liked, I think I would have gone for a place overlooking the ocean, nice and relaxing...

Maybe I should just invite the world and get one of those mobile cash machines and carry it round with me... get them to pay at the door and flee the reception...

I have the same problem as u dyar as my mum has met jims parents only once about 2 years ago and other then that nobody knows either side..maybe its a blessing in disguise.

[Gerda]

If I had to do over again I would elope too..

My husband comes from a very religouse family and when they found out he was planning on marrying me they said no way would it happen. The very first time they "met" me I had shown up at there house because Robert had invited me over (he was 18, me 16) His mom answered the door I asked if he was home.. she walked away and told him I could not come in nor could he see me again. Talk about first impretions.. I'm not sure what he hell I did wrong standing at the door that night, but i heard his mom crying to him about morals and the works. He still dated me for about 3 years (he was in the airforce so it was a long distance relationship.) Anyway when we got to the wedding they said straight out that they would not come. I told them that he really wanted them there and if they loved him at all they would show up. In looking back it wasn't such a good idea seeing how at the end of the wedding they walked up to him and disowned him stating he was no longer there son. His grandmother was the worst writing me a letter saying in a not such nice way that I was going to hell because I did not belong to there church.. who knew I was so evil So a vegas wedding would have been nice!!! Show up one day and say.. "heres my husband, deal with it"

gerda

[Little lucie @ Simon]

Oh Gerda, ive just read your post and can't beleive how awful that must have been for you . It's true the saying tho' " You can choose your friends but you cant choose your family" . Just think it's them loosing out by choosing not to have you in their lives . You don't need people like that , your much better off without them . Lucie

[Guest]

Religion has a lot to answer for, I'm sorry to hear about all that trauma, Gerda.

[SA Smurfette]

Oh Gerda thats awful

Well i'm glad your husband didn't listen to his family and married the woman he loved anyway....awww

[aussiesmurf]

Hi Gerda

You poor thing, here I was complaining about a pushy mother in law, and u have a monster in law, makes me realise that even tho my mother in law is pushy I am very lucky that she accepts me even tho I'm not macedonian.

They r the ones missing out for sure, do u have children? Would they or do they accept ur children?

The best revenge on ur monster in law is to live a long and happy life with ur husband which I am sure u r doing...

[Bunno Smurf]

Mother-in-laws...don't get me started! I'm glad your husband had the gumption to stick by you, Gerda. Mine isn't so bad I guess. I don't know whether it is me mellowing or her. She sure irritates me sometimes but at least she didn't object to me marrying Phil.

The worst thing though is that we share the same birthday (which she seemed to think was a sign from God that Phil and I should be together ). Every year Phil says what do you want for your birthday and I say "Not to have to spend the day with your mum." Men...they never get you what you want!

Phil's family is very into "family birthdays". Everyone meets up and has a party so we usually have to drive the 2hrs to Perth for "nan's party". Then just as she's cutting the cake she says "oh yeah it's Linda's birthday too" as a kinda after thought.

[Syd Smurf]

3 cheers for Robert me thinks. Actually...I am more impressed by how he puts up with the smurfs taking over his life

That sounds really awful how you were treated but it's nice to see Robert has a mind of his own and was man enough to choose his own destiny.

My family haven't really accepted Mrs Dyar yet but I have told them on more than one occasion to "get over it". I think they feel Mrs Dyar is not good enough but it's just a load of crap as I am truly lucky that she puts up with me at all.....and Syd....and the rest of the blue gang.

I guess there is no pleasing some people (i.e. the inlaws)